Secondhand Reviews: "Little Fockers"

Rated PG-13 for strong language, sexual situations and, let's face it, the title.

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Some movies can't possibly live up to the hype... no matter how much you love them they're a disappointment because they didn't meet your high expectations. Then there are movies like "Little Fockers". There has hardly been a movie this year that's been more consistently badly reviewed, so I came to this with lower expectations that I would have thought possible. Make no mistake, mind you, it's a bad movie... at times, a very bad movie... but no movie could possibly have lived DOWN to the negative buzz of this one, so the fact that I didn't hate it as much as I had expected to, and on a few occasions (very few) laughed, was not exactly a PLEASANT surprise... I don't think I'd call anything about this movie pleasant... but it was a surprise nonetheless.

After we met the bride's parents in "Meet The Parents" and the groom's parents in "Meet The Fockers", what can be left? Well, it seems that Deniro's character has been having health problems that make him start thinking about his mortality and the possibility of Stiller's Gaylord Focker becoming the new head of the family. He and his son-in-law strangely bond over the issue of raising the kids properly, leading to all kinds of wackiness at a potential advanced school for the kids. Then there's the attractive pharmaceutical rep (played by Jessica Alba) who has a thing for Stiller and has him thinking about straying after some 8 years of his happy marriage. Of course, it all comes together eventually, along with appearances from the in-laws.

Well, yes, there are the usual bodily function jokes. Nothing funnier than a kid puking on his father, right? And Jessica Alba's pharmaceutical rep represents an advanced Viagra-like E.D. drug she wants Stiller to promote, so do you think there's a remote possibility that father-in-law Deniro might eventually wind up getting dosed and suffering one of those 4-hour-plus erections they warn about in the ads? (If you've seen Jake Gyllenhaal go through this in "Love & Other Drugs", you sure don't need to see it again here.) And if you were hoping that at least some of the ridiculousness might be relieved by Dustin Hoffman & Barbra Steisand as the senior Fockers, you should be aware that their combined total screen time in the entire movie is perhaps fifteen minutes (which is a break, at least, for them.)

So, why did I bother to see it, even at second run prices? Well, I still contend that the original "Meet The Parents", while no comedy classic, actually was a pretty funny movie. And in spite of whatever indignities visited upon him (well, MOST of the time), Deniro can still make me laugh by playing it as straight as he knows how (which is pretty straight). Basically, I hoped for more of the first movie than the second one contained. And let's face it, Harvey Keitel and Deniro together again? Well, Keitel has a classic blink & you'll miss him role, and while Jessica Alba gives every impression of being a perfectly nice person who would probably be fun to socialize with, she's no actress. And it was surprising how long a 100-minute movie can feel.

But, at times there were at least ever-so-brief glimpses of a funnier, better movie peaking through the curtains. The scenes at the far-too-high-class-for-its-own-good school Stiller is considering for the kids were amusing in their satire of the "top 2 percent", and it was occasionally funny to see Deniro and Stiller actually becoming buddy-buddy, if only because you just KNOW that's not going to last. (And there was a chuckle or two when a teacher mistakes Stiller and Deniro for a gay couple.

Yeah, it's still a turkey most of the time. And I wouldn't recommend it to fans of any of the stars. And after last year's starring turn in "Greenberg", it was a letdown to see Stiller falling back into the old patterns again. But... and wouldn't you just love to see a line like this in a movie ad?... "If you happen to be on a plane that's showing this, it probably won't make you want to jump off without a parachute". Probably. Hey, how about this for a quote?... "There have been worse movies in this series"? Or maybe "At least it doesn't star Jennifer Aniston"? Well, just to make it clear: there's certainly no need to go to any bother to see this, but if you happen to, it's not as bad as it could be. Wow. Do I sound enthusiastic to you yet?